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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25523824">Forever Young. Forever You.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/airiustide/pseuds/airiustide'>airiustide</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Avatar: The Last Airbender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Bloodbending, Discussions of death, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Romance, Semi tragedy, Zutara Week, former kataang, i promise this has a happy ending</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 07:27:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,543</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25523824</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/airiustide/pseuds/airiustide</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Lu Ten has a son. The day the boy had come carried in the arms of a relative and a confession carefully written on parchment by his deceased mother, the tides had shifted. Iroh, filled with utter joy, now had a piece of his son in the form of a four year old boy.</p><p>Zuko no longer had a claim and disappears without a trace. </p><p>When things become restless in the former Fire Nation colonies and Katara is requested to aid the White Lotus in a strike against the Ozai Society four years later, never would the waterbender anticipate who she would find during her stay. Yet this was no time for a happy reunion.</p><p>Zuko is dying and Katara realizes it's too late to save him. </p><p>*A seven part piece for zutara week.*</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Katara/Zuko (Avatar)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>154</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Zutara Week 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Reunion</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I've always wanted to touch on a fic like this with the possibility that Azula's lightning causes permanent damage to Zuko's heart after he redirects it inaccurately. Though, this might seem like a tragedy, I promise it's not but there will be moments of overcoming fears, acceptance, tears and finally love.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Lu Ten has a son. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The day the boy had come carried in the arms of a relative and a confession carefully written on parchment by his deceased mother, the tides had shifted. Iroh, filled with utter joy, now had a piece of his son in the form of a four year old boy and Zuko no longer had a claim.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was only natural that the rightful heir take his place. The Earth Kingdom woman who had stolen the heart of a soldier boy gave birth to a firebender. Iroh was thrust back in the world of Fire Nation politics, now Lord regnant until his grandson came of age. There was no mistaking how pleased many were to see the once banished prince removed from power. In fact, Zuko whole-heartedly agreed, graciously stepping down without a single objection. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The former Fire Lord who had risked his title and livelihood was thrust our of court. With a war criminal father, a legally insane sister and a treacherous mother, what was left for him but a string of failures and bad blood running through his veins? </span>
  <span>The world was quick to discard his accomplishments in favor of this unknown boy not even three month into Zuko’s reign. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Something about this doesn’t feel right.” Aang says quietly to himself, his worry apparent on his face. It does not fail to reach his companions’ ears. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“There must be a way for you to continue your reign.” Katara muses. “It can’t just end here. What you did, you’re uncle turning down his rights and proclaiming you heir in his place, just like that, it’s over? You earned this.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hate to break it to you, Sugarqueen, but blood outranks merit.” Toph informed her with her feet propped up on the arm of Zuko’s lounge chair, a pinky buried in her ear. “No matter how good or bad a person is, as long as they carry the right gene, the position of power is handed down on a silver platter.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I say he got a pass.” Sokka added his input. “Dodging a bullet like that? Now it’s somebody else’s problem. Besides, the nation’s in good hands, the kid comes from Iroh’s line of tea-loving cookiness.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I swear, you can be so insensitive.” Katara scolded, shooting daggers at her brother. Turning to Zuko, she softens. “If you talk to your uncle, I’m sure he can work things out with the council.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko doesn’t look at the others. He peers into the distance, the palace vast and large and stretched out so far, that a concern twists in the others guts as they notice his concentration stone dead on the sea beyond it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Zuko, buddy?” Sokka breaks his concentration.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hm? Did you guys say something?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The Gaang glance at one another. They expected an outburst, a display of disappointment or even anger- which they thought was completely justified. Instead, for the first time ever, Zuko expresses indifference; completely unreadable to the people who know him best. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Something about this doesn’t feel right.” Aang repeats.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara dismisses it. They were all worried, of course, but that’s all that it was, just worry. Temporary. Spirits, how she would come to regret this, for none of them could have ever predicted this would be the last time they would see Zuko.</span>
</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They couldn’t stay. There were people who needed them. There were wounds heal, homes to rebuild. A jagged scar slashed upon the world that required years of patching; trust was fragile like glass. Glass wasn’t so easy to keep together when the spider cracks ran deep.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Aang was the first to leave, his Avatar duties calling him once again. Suki was next. Toph stayed to comfort the Fire Lord with the little time she had spared before reuniting with her parents; without her, Iroh would not have so easily been able to weed out those who opposed his claim and sought to harm his grandson. But at night, he shut himself away; the former Dragon of the West lost another son. It became apparent when eight months of his whereabouts were officially unknown. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The water tribe siblings were last, their stay becoming less and less necessary. Zuko wasn’t coming back and Iroh denied company a month within the former Fire Lord’s disappearance, only showing his face to young Koji.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>‘Let him grieve in his own way’ Toph had told Katara before she left. ‘Over staying our welcome will not help him and we all know once Sparky sets his mind on something, there’s no changing it.’</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>‘How can he just...leave? Without a trace, without a word? Especially to his Uncle?’</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Toph shrugged, ‘I think Twinkletoes was onto something when he said this didn’t feel right’</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Katara’s brows lifted. ‘I’m pretty sure he was referring to Koji’s sudden appearance.’ Katara retorted.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Toph shook her head, sighing before throwing a sack over her shoulder and planting a bare foot on the metal plank leading to the ship taking her home. ‘Even you couldn’t have missed it, Sugarqueen; Sparky wasn’t just</span>
  </em>
  <span> not</span>
  <em>
    <span> himself, it was like...he was prepared for all this to go down.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Katara scoffed. ‘There’s no way he could have foreseen Lu Ten having a son.’</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>‘No;’ Toph muttered, ‘No, Sparky wouldn’t have kept this from us, but he’s holding back something. People don’t just disappear like that without a word.” The earthbender snapped her fingers. ‘Not even the ever dramatic firepants.’</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara looks back to that time, a year ago. People just don’t disappear like that, the nineteen year old waterbender repeated to herself. But what could make Zuko, a persistent and loyal man to his friends and country, vanish? </span>
</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s a disturbance in the West. The colonies have become restless and there’s rumors of an organization on the rise of executing a vicious plan against the crown prince.” Aang points to the sky with his staff. He doesn’t look at her. He hasn’t looked at her in a year.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara nods, a grim countenance taking over her face. One year ago, her lip would have trembled and her heart would grip. “Is that where you’re headed?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No.” Aang replied flatly. "In fact, Piandao himself had requested both our assistance."</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He definitely hates me, Katara surmised. She sighs, blue eyes flickering over to the now teenage Avatar. His face had slimmed down from his round features, his stature tall and lean. He had grown into a young man widely recognized for his accomplishments in defeating Ozai and his vision in bringing the world harmony, a beacon and home for all walks of the four nations. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That’s why Katara was here, aiding him in decisions such as selecting the city council, inaugurating policy and trade, and reviewing applications for small and large businesses eager to establish their wealth in the newly developed city.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span> “It won’t be easy to break up an organization ring like the Ozai Society.” Aang glances over at Katara briefly. “The fact that they have bases in different locations among both the Fire Nation and the colonies makes it all the more difficult.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Then striking at once would be the only solution.” Katara added. “I knew there were people who conspired against Iroh and Koji but I can’t believe the Ozai Society strengthened since-” She swallows the rest of her words.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“The White Lotus has kept me up to date. They have several groups positioned at each location, some placing spies among the ranks. Unfortunately, my focus remains here with the unrest with the benders and the non-benders and I’m afraid my absence will only escalate things. I would love to oversee it personally-</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“-but since the Ozai Society has yet to take action, your presence might hasten their plans.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Exactly.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ll go.” Katara offered. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Actually, I was thinking-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ll go.” She insisted. Aang frowns much to her dislike. He didn’t even want her in Republic City. The only reason he made way was due to her forcefulness. That’s when they were together and that’s when things between them became complicated. Katara was not a sideliner and she was not going to wait for her boyfriend to seek her when he was good and ready to come around. At first, she moved here to be closer to him, or so she thought; in reality, she came here for herself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s dangerous.” Aang warned her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And if you knew me, you’d know I can be too.” Katara turns on her heels, curling her fingers in her long, chocolate hair out of nervous habit. This was them now, no longer Aang and the Avatar’s girl. No longer the people they thought they were to each other but the reality of their separate lives. “I’ll leave at first light.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Former Lieutenant Jee was the first to greet her when her airship docked. He had not aged a day. Katara bows, then extends a hand in greeting. Instead, the older gentleman pulls her in for a hug. She laughs, returning it in kind.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Jee informs her that the White Lotus has reserved a room for her at one of their secret locations, disguised as a seedy bar tucked away between a rundown general store and a bakery. It’s late afternoon when they arrive, patrons hardly occupy the dining area. A young boy eagerly takes Katara’s belongings after being tipped generously by Jee. He departs, stating that he will be back for her come morning to meet Master Piandao to go over strategy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>There’s a flight of stairs leading to the second floor where a line of rooms are rented. The boy places her belongings at her bedside, informing Katara that dinner will be served at sundown. She uses this time to unpack, pondering how Master Piandao and the others had been. Sokka would be jealous when he learns Katara will be working with him, imagining the recently made Chieftain's dramatic reaction in front of Suki and their newborn twins. The waterbender chuckles to herself, lying down in bed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Waking from a quick nap leaves her hungry. Katara washes her face from the basin in her washroom then makes her way downstairs. The place is now at full capacity; loud with rumbustious guests and drunken regulars. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The waterbender worries little, having encountered this on many occasions during her travels around the world, even trying an ale or two. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She maneuvers between tables so she could reach the bar stand where she recognizes the owner as one of the Lotus members; a short, white haired woman well into her sixties, with the smile of an angel and the mouth of a sailor. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara leans over the counter top, waving to the barkeeper. The older woman nods to the waterbender an acknowledgement while handing a tray of food to her clumsy granddaughter. A loud crack and a strangled cry behind Katara provokes her to snap her head at the owner of that humiliating scream. She’s horrified to find an open hand reaching for her rear and a gloved, larger one bending it back in at an ungodly angle. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara gaze locked on the stranger clothed in all black with two dao swords strapped to his back, his face covered save his eyes, which were curtained by his shaggy, dark hair. She gasped at the sight of amber meeting her stare and the hint of marred, pink tinted skin. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Before she could process the stranger, or the pervert writhing for dear life, she’s brought back with a snap and a high-pitched scream. He’s not in front of her anymore, weaving through the crowded room for the door. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Counterpart</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>After reunion comes joy- at least Katara had hoped. When she finally has the opportunity to confront the stranger, she learns a devastating secret that weights heavy on her heart and soul.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for the lovely comments. I know it’s a slower process and shorter chapters than I normally write but as we venture through zutara week, things will certainly fall into this place. :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>“Speak what we feel, and not what we ought to say. Well, I’m forever young, and you're forever you.” -We are Life by Emarosa</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She wasn’t crazy. She hoped.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara wants to confront the man in black out in the open, only that would prove to be futile if it really happened to be who she thought it was. No doubt, he would run upon seeing her again like her first day here. She had no evidence it was Zuko but he </span>
  <em>
    <span>looked </span>
  </em>
  <span>at her, and when he did it was clear that he recognized her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It took about a week before he crossed her, unnoticed to him. He was taller, much taller. His clothes did not hide his muscle definition and she can tell he was intensively active. Much different from the seventeen-year-old buy she knew but there was no mistaking those eyes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once she picked up on his routine, Katara was quick to follow, utilizing every chance between meeting Lotus members and rest to make it just an inch closer to Zuko. She stopped every so feet each time, afraid he might pick up on her stalking- other than the off chance of her being wrong weighing in her mind. </span>
  <em>
    <span>No point in turning back now</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Katara thought, </span>
  <em>
    <span>I am officially labeled a creeper</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was the same every night. He came out just as the sky turned night, stealthy moving in the dark, through alleyways and barely traveled streets. She remains anonymous as well, choosing clothes colored in dark blue and tying her hair in a low ponytail. He appears from behind an abandoned building again, silently prowling through the streets. This time, he’s not making his usual destination. Katara curses when he stops abruptly a quarter mile from his usual path and turns his head slowly over his shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara stills, biting her lip to hold back anticipated breathing and willing her pounding heart to cease beating in her ears. He’s hesitant for only a moment, facing forward again and slipping into the alley. Katara, darts after him, stopping at the corner. Shock flushed her face. He’s gone!</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Cement trickles from above and she barely misses the figure swinging onto the rooftop. Blue eyes widen, shocked to find the stranger peering down at her. In the dark his golden gaze seemed to mock her. Come get me, if you dare, they read. Katara always enjoyed a good challenge. <br/><br/></span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p><br/>He’s running ahead of her, hoping from rooftop to rooftop. It felt like they were in sync, the way they ran through the night, his movements as flawless as a languid waterbender. The moon was on her side tonight, providing her the much needed energy to keep up with him. The excitement of it all sang in her blood, heightening her adrenaline. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara wanted to laugh with childish delight. Lift a hand out to the sky and feel the wind wisp between her fingers. Never mind that she was chasing after a unknown man but something told her he wasn’t intent on harming her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She halts gracefully in her tracks when he jumps from one of the rooftops, sliding across a tarp and swinging on the structure holding it up just before he lands on his feet. Katara makes a disappointed groan, knowing this was the end of their game. Instead, she stays on his tracks via rooftop, afraid that if she took the time to crawl down, she might lose him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She crouches low, cursing herself more than ever. How had she not realized she had wondered into enemy territory. Ozai Society members occupied this area, having scouted  here the week before with the White Lotus under guise. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The man made two raps on the door across the street from where Katara hid, a sharp one thrice, then another two. The door cracks open and Katara can’t make out their voices. The man in black removes his glove and lifts the sleeve of his right arm to reveal a symbol tattooed right below his palm.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She wanted to kick herself. This wasn’t Zuko after all, and she had exposed herself to the enemy. Regardless, she was already here and decided to scope out what was taking place, at least, settling on leaving before the stranger or anyone else decided to come out of the house. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>An hour went by, and no one’s left or entered. She’ll have to return home and let the White Lotus know her findings, on top of admitting that she followed an enemy without their knowledge. La, she was in for a scolding. Katara kicks the dust under her feet, preparing for a running start.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Leaving so soon.” A raspy voice brought her to an abrupt stop.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara narrows her eyes, examining the figure carefully approaching her in the dark, contemplating whether to take off or use the opportunity to question the man; though it might turn into a physical confrontation, she was ready for both. “Are you going to make it worth my while if I decided to stay?” She inquires, crossing her arms over her chest.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Amusement flickered in those gold eyes, but he doesn’t reply to her question. “Not very smart coming here.” He tells her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara smiles behind the cloth covering her nose and mouth. That voice, so distinct and so much like him. “ Yet, here you are.” She retorts.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“This isn’t a joke.” He dismisses her playful attitude. “You need to return home.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not going back to the inn.” Katara argued, hurt that he was pushing her away without an explanation off the bat. “At least...at least tell me you’re doing okay.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He shakes his head. “Not the inn. Go home, Katara.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No!” She yells, closing the fists at her side. Zuko was stubborn but Katara was even more so. She had him here, she couldn’t stand the idea of him disappearing again.,Her voice carried in the dark, and both of them heard chatter below. A group flooded the street, muttering suspicions. Humiliation and worry colored Katara’s face. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Damn.” Zuko groaned, snatching Katara by the elbow. “We gotta leave.”<br/><br/></span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>So this is where he’s been hiding? The apartment wasn’t exactly rundown but it certainly wasn’t spacious either. It was decent as decent could get. A single bed, a small table and a washroom fit for one. A bed was posted at the far side of the wall, opposite the door, right next to a large window. You could see the town far out in the woods beyond it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara wasn’t ready to remove her disguise, watching Zuko intently as he quietly closed the door behind them and had yet to reveal himself. The air between them thickeded, from the tiny room or their awkwardness, Katara couldn’t tell which. Four years had gone by since the last time they’d seen each other. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko only stares. From behind his shaggy hair, he looks mysterious, ominous, dangerous. For all she knew, he could have very well become those things, four years can change a person.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You working for the White Lotus?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He blinks, taking what feels like forever to reply. He shakes his head.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re doing this alone.” Katara guessed, more of a statement than a question, rather.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes.” He tells her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara licks her lips, nervous now that she truly knew it was her missing friend. “Are you the one who’s been anonymously sending tips to the White Lotus.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And you’ve spent all four years infiltrating the Ozai Society? Because you knew your Uncle and Koji were their new target?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“...Your Uncle misses you.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t.” He says sternly, eyes darting sharply at Katara. “I should’ve taken you to the inn.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara doesn’t know why but that hurt more than she thought. Zuko was known to push people away but he was flat out trying to get rid of her. If she hadn’t lured those members out, he might have left her without a second thought.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Changing the subject, Zuko announces he’ll make them tea, finally removing the mask from his face and revealing paler than normal skin. Being away from the Fire Nation must have made it so. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Feeling more relaxed in his presence, Katara takes a seat on the bed, studying the place, though there wasn’t much. Zuko kept it simple, probably in case there was risk of his true identity being revealed. Or he cared little for anything other than necessities. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She was anxious to know the reason behind him leaving, a million questions hanging on the tip of her tongue. Katara knows if she blurted out a single inquiry, he’ll shut her out immediately. Zuko comes back with their tea in two wooden cups, sitting beside her and taking a quiet sip of his cup. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara does the same before proclaiming. “I’ve missed you too.” Hoping it wouldn’t make him retreat.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A furious blush colors Zuko cheeks, his hard features softening. He looks away, clearing his throat and Katara notices his Adam's apple bob. She blushes too, aware just how much he had grown. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I-I missed you. All of you; Aang, Sokka, Toph. It’s been hard…” He admits.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Progress? She only hoped. “Really?” Katara soothes, hesitantly reaching out to enclose his hand with hers. Zuko doesn’t shake her away. <br/><br/></span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Come back.” Katara whispers softly. “After this, come back with me. If not to the Fire Nation, there’s always a place for you in Republic City. Aang can-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He slips from her grasp, standing on his feet and trudging across the room. Zuko slumps against the wall, crossing his arms and shaking his head. “There’s no place for me. Go, Katara. Back to Republic City, back to Aang.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And what will happen if I leave, after you and the White Lotus take down the Ozai Society?” She wasn’t going to leave, of course. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuki shrugs. “Why do you care?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Because you have family who are worried about you. Iroh is going out of his mind, concerned about what happened to you, he’s not the same.” </span>
  <em>
    <span>And because I want you back</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she wanted to say, burrowing down her confession.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m doing this </span>
  <em>
    <span>for</span>
  </em>
  <span> my Uncle.” Zuko clarified. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No, you're being selfish and doing things on your own again. Keeping everyone who loves you at arm's length, telling yourself you’re protecting them, when in fact you’re only hurting them-</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Stop!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You stop!” She promised herself she’d keep her cool, she promised herself she would give Zuko the much needed time to come around. That flew out the window real fast. “When will you grow the hell up! I swear, I thought you matured after joining Aang but silly me for thinking that you’ve evolved from the childish, egocentric, spoiled prince-” She was on her feet, flying at him. Katara couldn’t contain the outrage, the audacity at how he lacked any consideration. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I said, </span>
  <em>
    <span>stop</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Zuko seethed, cuffing her wrists and pressing them to her chest.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Not until you fix this! Not until you make things right by everyone who has been worried sick about you!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s none of your damn business!” He shouted, releasing her wrists and reeling back. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara’s left speechless. It doesn’t hit her that a single tear escapes down her cheek until her vision is blurred and a ball forms in her throat. She swallows, the ache failing to subside, and she turns away from Zuko in a daze. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Inhaling sharply, Katara regains her composure, wiping the stray tear with the palm of her hand. “I’m worried about you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>There’s a moment of dead silence, beating darkly in the room. The weight came down heavy on Katara’s limbs like chains. She can hear Zuko’s feet shuffle on the wooden floor, a slow creak like that of a desperate cry. Then he sighs, footsteps retreating to the front door. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t be.” <br/><br/></span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span><br/>She didn’t know when he returned. Dreary, swollen eyes fluttered open to the aura of his presence right next to the bed she borrowed. The inn was across town and the thought of leaving didn’t sit right with her, aside from the exhaustion of their discourse last night.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She sits up quietly, looking over his slumped figure; a mere shadow in a darkened room. Zuko’s hands were clasped together, elbows to knees and his forehead pressed to his fists. He seems to be asleep, until...</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I thought I had a purpose.” Zuko broke the silence. “I had so much to offer at the time, now that I had found my way. You, uncle, aang, everyone...you all gave me a reason to push forward. And though it took me so long to change, to finally realize the man I needed- no, wanted to be, in the end the universe decided I still wasn’t worthy enough.” He paused, Zuko’s breath shook with every attempt to gather himself. “I was so happy. I didn’t deserve it but I was so happy to have met you all. My only regret was that I didn’t make you part of my life sooner, that I didn’t make things right with my Uncle sooner, that I didn’t take the opportunity to truly examine my bad behavior early on in life and make better decisions- because then I’d have more of those precious moments to hold onto.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara doesn’t like this. He’s pouring his heart out but she doesn’t like where this is going. A black hole formed in the pit of her stomach, noting the way Zuko clung roughly to the front of his tunic, at the very center where the evidence of his sacrifice lied. She doesn’t want to meet his eyes when he finally turns his gaze to her. She doesn’t want the memory of those amber eyes glossed with fear and sadness staring back at her with utter defeat. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Please, Yue</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Katara prays.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Katara,” He says softly. Any other time she would have loved to hear him call her name so softly- like a flutter kissing her cheek- but not like this, never like this. “I’m dying.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Fuse</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Zuko tells Katara about his condition and Katara tells Zuko how she truly felt the day he took lightning for her. They're able to close the space that had plagued them and Zuko expresses his adoration for chrysanthemums.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>fluff...sweet, sweet fluff. now to dote in the fact that i actually wrote Zuko telling Katara his love for flowers, of all things!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>"They say, 'You know, you gotta slow down, there's no coming back'</em>
  <br/>
  <em>So young and restless, I'm a cliché, yeah, but it's easier said than done" -leaving by illenium ft. eden </em>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>Azula administered everlasting damage to his heart. The inaccurate posture of redirecting her lightning set off a ticking time bomb in his chest. At first unknown to him, Zuko ignored the signs. Katara had advised him that there could be effects from the aftermath. After all, he was struck by lightning. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Taking it as minor symptoms, nothing more than temporary, Zuko would often deal with random muscle spasms, twitches and sudden chest pains. No cause for alarm, nor was there a need to present the symptoms to a healer, wary that those who opposed him might be searching for a weakness; something a new Fire Lord couldn’t let them catch wind of. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>A month after his coronation, Zuko went into cardiac arrest. Iroh desperately performed CPR. Within minutes of being unresponsive Iroh did the unthinkable, using electricity from his lightning bending to jump start the young Fire Lord’s heart. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Zuko had no memory of the event, only awakening to his Uncle’s teary face. He couldn’t ignore the signs any longer. Summoning the healer of the North, Yugoda, in secret, it was then that the Fire Lord learned of his impending death. No one knew; not his uncle, not his friends. When Iroh questioned Zuko about what had happened and begged him to seek help, he only ensured the Dragon of the West that all was well and what had happened was just a scare.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Of course, Iroh never believed him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Later, a blessing in disguise showed up in his throne room; Lu Ten’s son. Now that his Uncle had family and an heir, Zuko could die in peace. He accepted the council’s demand that he step aside. But it was not that easy. The faithful members of the Ozai Society still weren't satisfied and found themselves a new target. Zuko couldn’t move on from this world until he knew Iroh and Koji were safe. He set out one last time to protect his Uncle, just as Iroh had done for him many times in Zuko’s life. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara hugged herself, listening as he explained why he disappeared. His voice came and went, the waterbender unable to fully process any of it other than the fact that there was one conclusion to why this all happened to him: she failed. Katara failed to save him.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re beating yourself up.” Zuko comments, lighting the stove for their dinner, though he wasn’t anticipating a guest and didn’t have much other than fish and a measly sack of rice. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>In fact, Katara basically invited herself into his apartment almost every day the last four days after meeting up with the White Lotus. She would demand he allow her to follow up so she could observe the status of his heart condition. The first time she had done this, Katara was finally convinced that even waterbending couldn’t stop this. Then again, if Yugoda couldn’t do the job, how could she? Disappointment and guilt was all she could take from it. Coming to terms that there was nothing she could do would be hard to accept. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara was also shocked and intrigued to discover the large dragon tattoo wrapping around Zuko’s his right arm and to the center of his back the first time she examined him. Where a red scaled beast extended its open claws, features contorted in a snarl. The waterbender’s blush deepened when she noted a symbol of scales tattooed around both sides of his waist, cutting nicely into his v-line.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Lucky for her, Zuko was oblivious to her reaction. It was a shame. He didn’t know how attractive he was and although the tattoos were an initiation to the Fire Lord’s current enemy, she couldn’t deny how good it looked on Zuko.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m not beating myself up.” Katara lied, kicking off her boots, feet swollen after chasing down a Ozai Society member. Unfortunate for them, interrogation was out of the question, the man having been silenced by someone in the shadows with a single dart. “Besides, it doesn’t help that you interfere like that.” She argued.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He would have given you nothing. There were others around none of you were aware of, the last thing you need before the raid is for them to see your face.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara grumbled. “I swear, you always have to be one step ahead.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Zuko smirked, handing her a plate of cooked fish and a small bowl of rice. “I guess some things about me never change.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara snatched the plate, placing it in her lap but somehow can’t find it in herself to eat. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Doing it again. You know, I’m the one dying but I’m not going to waste food.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She frowns. “How can you be so casual about this?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The former Fire Lord shrugged, bringing the rice to his lips. “Had more time, I reckon. I don’t have long. Good food is all I have to go on.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara scoffed. “That’s it? Food? Not the thrill of chasing bad guys?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That, waterbender, is a perk.” Zuko prodded her lips gently with his chopsticks, getting her to unconsciously open her mouth to take a bite of fish. “Food is a pleasure.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I can think of many pleasures other than food.” Katara rolled her eyes. She immediately blushes, observing Zuko’s face burning a hot red. She clearly didn’t think that statement through, now having embarrassed herself. “Anyway. isn't there something other than infiltrating the Ozai Society you want to do? Like a bucket list, maybe?” She inquired, trying to change the subject. </p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>“The rhythm is still thrown off.” Katara sighed, bending the water back in the basin. “But l did manage to patch up a few scarrings. I can’t say if that’ll make a difference but it was worth trying.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The former Fire Lord says nothing, shrugging on his robe. “That’s to be expected.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara bites a comment, only humming a reply and taking the basin to the washroom to dump. Four years away didn’t much lessen Zuko’s walls. Distance happens to be his favorite defense mechanism. Usually, the waterbender would press, but out of respect for what he’s going through, she decides to reel it back. Temporarily, of course. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It dawns on them just how late it is when thunder clapped and with it, rain fell. It turned night into a hazy cloud of bearing rain, coming down with a force either had ever seen.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The spirits must love torturing Katara. “Guess I’ll have to run.” She mumbled.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Take the bed.” Zuko offers, securing the sash around his waist. “I’ll sleep on the floor tonight.”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>Rain has a way of bringing people’s innermost thoughts to the surface; blow away one’s guard and carry it away to the scattered winds. It patters on the window, much like a song telling it’s sad verse. For Katara, this was her comfort, her world. Everything that made her her, was shaped in every droplet. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Zuko envied her. There would be no sleep for him tonight, like most nights. Aware that he wasn’t being mindful of his health, he stared absentmindedly around the small room, back against the wall and arms crossed on bent knees. The pitter patter of his heart beating weakly in his ears.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s hard to live when you’re dying because truly living requires you to acknowledge that it will all be gone in a moment’s notice. Some days were better than others, easier- darker days made the simplest things seemingly impossible. He could go about it with the intent to live normally but it does not make the reality easier when Zuko longed for more time, more precious moments. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Zuko opens his right hand and observes the life lines printed into the palm before flipping it over to trace the tiny scars criss crossing his skin. The hair never grew back where sparks of lightning had fried on his arms, a strange discoloration left in its place. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>A reserved sigh escapes his lips. <em> Soon, it’s approaching soon. </em> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Missions were becoming more of a strain, his breath hardly caught up with him. Spasms and twitches became more frequent and he thanked Agni Katara wasn’t around to witness it. The former Fire Lord began to question if he was truly content with dying alone. Four years ago, it was logical to protect his Uncle, his friends and most of all, himself. The void only grew larger, the pit in his very soul blackened by isolation. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>While he doted in a sea of his own self-pity, Zuko’s sad gaze landed on Katara’s sleeping form. He could easily say that every part of him would do what he did over and over again, even if he took a million lightnings to the heart. No amount of fear about death could ever take that away. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It was like it was in slow motion.” Katara’s soft voice broke through the silent room.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Zuko’s brow furrowed. He never said a word out loud, yet Katara spoke as though he had; as though his very thoughts had spilled to the floor. And if they had, he could visualize Katara scooping up every piece and cradle them in her arms. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“With Aang, it happened so fast. So fast, that I could barely comprehend it. Before I knew it he was plummeting to his death and I was carrying him away in my arms. But with you, it was this slow, agonizing pain of anticipation as I saw nothing but blue, blinding light coming at me and you...you ran right in front of it. Every single thought I had racing through my mind stopped to scream at me ‘he’s going to die’.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He stares at her incredulously, her form never moving, Katara never meeting his eyes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I was overcome with this grip of fear and helplessness when I tried to reach out for you and you, for me. Every second felt like you were slipping away and I was desperate. I can still hear Azula’s laughter, still see the red blood sky and the blinding light coming at me. Worst of all, I can still see you curling into a ball, clenching your chest and reaching out for me. That’s how this feels; you, reaching out for me and I’m helpless to save you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara doesn’t remember how they ended up in a strong embrace with Zuko pressed on top, forehead to hers and callous fingers wiping away her tear-stained cheek. </p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>“Chrysanthemums.” Zuko murmurs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara’s tears have dried, red shot, but less swollen than earlier, they meet Zuko’s, now lying beside her with his arm draped across her waist and her leg dangled over hist. Katara knits her brow. “What is that?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You asked me yesterday about my bucket list and I sort of avoided it. There are these flowers, they don’t grow anywhere else that I know off other than certain parts of the Earth Kingdom. I once came across this field where every year this city would plant Chrysanthemums in the spring, they blossom most at summer’s end and are more vibrant in the fall. One of the planters offered me one that was in complete bloom, though it was still early.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I was on the run and already separated from Uncle. I wanted to chuck it. But it was unlike anything I’d ever seen in a flower. I’ve never recalled the name before but the golden color caught my eye. I did a lot of research about it when I arrived back in the Fire Nation.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Zuko pauses, waiting for a jeer or a laugh. He’s embarrassed to wonder if Katara thinks it silly for his dying wish to see a bunch of flowers. With an inhale, he continues.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I learned they came in colors of all kinds too: red, yellow, white, violet...each one carries a special meaning.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katara seems to beam at this small piece of information. “Oh? Tell me! I want an example.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, white symbolizes loyalty and honesty. Violet for a wish to get well. Yellow for neglected love and sorrow.” He swallows, cheeks turning crimson. “Red symbolizes love and deep passion.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He falls breathless at the way Katara smiles, lacing their hands together and tugging Zuko closer. “I already like red.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Celestial</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Death is inevitable. Not everyone is meant to be saved. The world can end in just a heartbeat and for Zuko that was very much the case. Emotions take a turn. Katara comes to the conclusion on how she truly feels about Zuko and Zuko faces the horrible reality of his ordeal.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i had no intentions of posting this so late after zutaraweek but due to an unfortunate tragedy on my husband's side of the family, i had to take some time away. i, of course, will continue with this fic, no worries. this also gives me a chance not to rush into meeting scheduled prompt dates but instead go more indepth on this fic. hope you guys enjoy and let me know what you think. &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>"I know I can be destructive and I can change the atmosphere. All I ask from you is patience. Some patience." - Lose Control by Meduza, Becky Hill, Goodboys.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Death is inevitable. Not everyone is meant to be saved. The world can end in just a heartbeat and for Zuko that was very much the case. That’s why he no longer wanted a single moment to be fleeting; to hang tight to the second chance the Spirits had so graciously bestowed upon him, disguising that blessing into the form of a master waterbender. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He grasped Katara’s arm, aiding her to the rooftop. The breeze blew through her long chocolate tresses. Swinging hair from her face, Katara flickers her gaze to Zuko with a smile in her eyes. It’s infectious, his lips curling into one of his own- she doesn’t see it but her being here gave him absolute joy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A midsummer festival was taking place. Green lanterns lit the streets, vendors lined up with mouth-watering food and live music had the townspeople giddy; dancing about and enjoying the atmosphere. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A door creaked just below and Zuko’s features go stern, gold eyes flashing dangerously in the moonlight and he signals Katara to follow. She creeps next to him, staying hidden in the shadows until Zuko okays for her to come closer.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s possible that the White Lotus might find out you’re here.” Katara warned. Tonight was the night. The raid will take place at thirteen locations, the main strike teams preparing for what could finally break these rings of murderers. “Aren’t you undercover?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko swings around, face so close to hers, Katara’s breath stills. “You don’t need to worry.” He tells her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara narrows at him. “Why do I have the feeling you’re keeping something from me.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He doesn’t reply, and she doesn’t like how inexpressive he’s being or the fact that whatever he’s thinking is hidden behind a mask. Why he’s avoiding her concerns or why he’s standing up and leading her to the middle of the rooftop with a teasing glint in his eyes, she couldn’t point her finger on it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It’s when Katara realizes the music had gone from lively to a slow, steady beat that she concludes exactly what he’s up to. She’s pleasantly surprised to find herself enveloped in his arms, Zuko’s palm pressed flat at the base of her spine, bringing her close to his broad chest and draping her arm over his shoulder. One hand rests on her waist, the other, enclosing the master waterbender’s.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They sway to the music, catching Katara off guard. She hides her laughter in his shoulder as their feet shuffle on the rooftop floor. “Who would’ve thought, former angry-face zuko would be a good dancer.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Why is that a surprise?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not exactly easy to see you willing to participate in dance...” Katara pauses. “You’re really good at this.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not like I learned by choice. Princely duties require the art of dancing and my teacher advised me how impossible it would be to woo a future courtesan if I did not learn the proper steps. My feet paid for it severely and so did my bottom. Lady Pamu always kept an impossibly large ruler at hand.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara pictured a smaller version of Zuko yelping every time a ruler came in contact with his bottom. “I take it that didn't fair well with Azula.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“More or less. Azula didn’t have to go to lessons, considering Pamu’s eyebrows had yet to grow back.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s tasteful.” Katara chuckled. “What else don’t I know about you?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko pondered this, his eyes lighting up. “I can play the tsungi horn.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Really?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Uncle would make me play every night during my banishment. It was really annoying.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Please, I bet you liked it.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Actually, I did and I was quite good at it. At least, Uncle said so.” Zuko was glad his blush was hidden. “I miss Uncle.” He admitted.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“He misses you too. And everyone else. Even Aang.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s good to know.” Zuko chuckled, imagining how the young Avatar might react upon seeing Zuko again. “He’s okay with you being here?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That irks her, how everyone truly thought of her relationship with Aang, as though he was the head and she just happened to be an attached limb. And though she knew Zuko meant well by the question, it was annoying all the same. Katara doesn’t blink when she tells him. “Why would his input matter whether I’m here or not? Even so, me and Aang are no longer together.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She almost pulls away but Zuko’s gentle squeeze to her waist makes her waver. “It doesn’t. If I came across as though you aren’t your own person, who can’t make decisions for themselves, I apologize. I admire you Katara. Your determination, your consideration and most of all, your desire to help those who can’t help themselves. When everyone else was so willing to turn their backs, even me, you refused. Thank you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara’s taken aback. Zuko admire her? What exactly did she have to offer in her position compared to him, who carried more power in his tiny finger than her entire existence? “For what?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“For reminding me why it’s important to live.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They fall into a comfortable silence. Voices in the crowd grew quieter and quieter as it got later. The smell of food began to diminish and eventually, the music stopped; but not the swaying of Zuko and Katara’s feet. Even when the world went still, they remained linked to each other. The former Fire Lord hums a tune for them, showing Katara a side of him she was glad to have witnessed. The hand on Zuko’s shoulder slid their way to the nape of his neck; delicate fingers stroking, igniting sparks where skin met skin. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The stars above them shine brighter as the streetlamps below grow dimmer. The roof was their stage and the sky their orchestra. They’re gazes do not stray from one another, Zuko’s heart pounding erratically after Katara grazes fingernails along the back of his neck. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I want to kiss you!” He blurts, the mood immediately going awkward. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Why was he such an idiot? What in his right mind made him say that out loud or remotely consider that Katara was attracted to him? That doesn’t come out nearly as shocking as Katara’s response.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Then what are you waiting for? Kiss me.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She had not seen Zuko since they separated, stealing Katara’s breath away with a parting kiss, their masks between them, before he turned on his heels and jumped from the rooftop with a mischievous glint in his gold orbs. It was after this that she joined the others in executing their plan and though they managed to round up almost all the criminals that were accounted for, there were still two missing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Piandao pointed out that one that went by the name Li and former Governor Ukano were nowhere to be seen. It became apparent that an informant had tipped off the ex governor. Katara willed herself not to hyperventilate, knowing this ‘Li’ was, in fact, Zuko working undercover. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They were successful in raiding the facility, of course, trapping the Ozai Society members in place. A shocking reveal had everyone’s blood running cold when it was discovered that not only was there a hit on the Crown Prince Koji and Fire Lord Iroh but that major cities across the globe were being targeted for a massive terrorist attack. Battle plans and illustrated instructions of massive bombs were uncovered.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her heart pounded in her ears, the anxiety of not knowing where Zuko or Ukano was weighed heavily on her. Dawn broke and it was clear the Ukano had gotten away. Piandao congratulated Katara and everyone else for their hard work, having received news via messenger hawk that the other locations had been successful and those involved apprehended. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once cleared to go, the master waterbender’s feet never carried her faster. She arrived at Zuko’s apartment first and was stricken to find he had not made it home yet. Her mind raced with a million scenarios, with a million outcomes, and all of them ended with Zuko dead somewhere. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She should have gone with him. She should have been there when things went down. He’s always looked sickly but lately she had taken notice of his staggers and labored breathing. The walls seem to close in on her and it was getting late. She was suffocating, minute by minute ticking by with only one thought in mind; Zuko. Katara failed to find sleep. <em>Not until he came home</em>, she thought, <em>not until he’s in front of me touching and kissing me again.</em></span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That kiss, that sweet kiss that did not meet skin to skin but left a fire where he placed his lips on hers- no kiss had ever made her senses come alive before. None. It wasn’t enough. Katara has always known she’s harbored an attraction for Zuko. He was handsome, yes, but so easy to talk to, easy to relate to. Well, after they had initially become friends. Falling for him? That in itself was unexpected, yet deep down inside, Katata felt as though her feelings regarding Zuko were more than attraction but genuine affection, and being here now proved she was indeed falling for him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m falling for him.” Katara whispered out loud, grasping the front of her tunic. She now needs him more than ever, she needs him here with her, clinging onto him for as long as the spirits will let her have him because, La, she was in love with him. <em>Bring him back</em>, she pleaded, <em>if for just one last time, please bring him back to me. </em></span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <span>He has blood on his clothes, eyes swollen and hair clinging to his forehead. He collapses at the front door, startling Katara, her first instinct to run by his side. Zuko quickly stops her, raising a hand and shaking his head, ignoring the concern contorting her lovely features. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He stumbles on his feet, slamming the door shut and leaning hard against it. His vision goes blurry.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Zuko, you’re bleeding.” Katara reasoned and made a step forward.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>‘Not mine.” Zuko managed to heave, jerking away when Katara tried to reach out for him. She pulls back, blinking back the hurt surfacing on her face.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He buries his head in his hands, both from shame of hurting Katara when she only cared about his well being and the realization of what truly took place the night before. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara stays still, twisting fingers in her tunic because Zuko has not moved, has not spoken since burying his face in his hands. He finally speaks and Katara swallows. She opens her mouth to ask what he had said but was silenced by his sudden declaration.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t want to die.” He sobs, falling to his knees and bowing low, hands covering his ears. “I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was all too real now. All too real. Zuko couldn’t control the tears, the absolute agony of no longer existing, of no longer being alive. If only he had appreciated his uncle more, or had made an attempt to be a better brother to Azula, or hadn’t taken for granted his future, maybe he wouldn’t be here desperately crying, desperately wishing for just a little more time. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara wants to hug him, wipe his tears away and tell him everything will be okay. But it wasn’t. This will never be okay. Death was a terrible burden that laid fear on many people’s hearts but came face to face with it, it makes living all the more unbearable. Katara can only watch, hugging herself and witnessing for the first time Zuko curling into a ball and crying himself weak. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I killed him.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And you’re okay with that?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No. But you had your reasons.” Katara replied, combing her fingers through his hair as he rested his head on her lap. If she had done the same to Yon Rha, no doubt Zuko would be comforting her just the same. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You don’t find me vial? Disgusting?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I find a lot of things about you, but never vial or disgusting.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko closed his eyes and groaned, enjoying the light scrape of her fingernails on his scalp. “You’re too good to me. Why are you so good to me?”  She had been patient while he cried until he was pale and swollen, cleaning the blood from his face and readying clean clothes for him while he bathed before she aided him to bed. This was how he wanted to go; his head in her lap and Katara’s gentle hum as she stroked his hair.   </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Perhaps I like you or something.” She jested.   </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Or something.” Zuko remarks, his scarred eye peering at her and she was thunderstruck by how beautiful he was; dark shaggy hair exposing his scarred cheek, the sharpness of his jawline and the structure of his fine cheekbones. He had certainly grown into a man.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Or something.” She repeats.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Prince Zuko.” Piandao nodded an acknowledgement, gaze stern and narrow. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Master.” Zuko greeted in a mutter. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>For a vigilante going undercover in enemy territory Katara thought Zuko being confronted by Piandao made him look like a toddler caught red handed in a cookie jar. Zuko asked for this meeting, also requesting Jee, yet somehow the two men didn’t seem all that surprised to find the former Fire Lord sitting nervously at the table of the inn's dining area where Katara was temporarily residing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So, you’ve been the one putting everyone, including yourself, in danger by infiltrating the Ozai society on your own?” Jee narrowed his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko deflated, bowing his head in shame. “Yes. I meant no disrespect, I only wanted to help. But I was sure to be careful so that no one would get hurt.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Foolish. Absolutely foolish. I’m only glad that Master Katara was not involved in this since the beginning.” Piandoa scolded. Then his face softens, sympathy shown in the old Master’s eyes. “When you told me what had happened to you, Zuko, I did not anticipate you being so reckless.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katara’s eyes widen. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He knew?</span>
  </em>
  <span> Why! Why did Piandao keep this from her? Not only that, why did he keep this from Iroh? It took her all, and the squeeze of Zuko’s hand on her thigh, to calm her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Is that why you brought Katara here?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Piandao and Jee exchange looks, not denying in the least what Zuko accused. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You had known I was following Ukano the whole time. I can hide a lot of things, even from Uncle sometimes- you and Jee, I bet it didn’t take a week before you knew who I was when you both arrived here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You think I wouldn’t know the reckless teenage boy I spent three years under the thumb of?” Jee arched a brow.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Piandao turned me down and refused to let me join the White Lotus.” Zuko snapped. “Of course I couldn’t sit there and do nothing while my Uncle and cousin were in danger!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Piandao sighed, gently stopping a waitress and requesting four cups of tea. The older gentleman smiled at the couple, resting his hands on the table. “Tea lightens the tension. At least, your uncle always says. Zuko, I was simply refusing your services only because I wanted you to live the remainder of your life with ease and no regrets.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko slammed his fist on the table, kicking back the chair he was sitting on. “The biggest regret I’d have would be to sit around while the Ozai Society plotted to murder my only family!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Zuko.” His rage is soothed over by the voice of his adoration and he’s immediately guilty for the outburst. Zuko frowns at the apprehending gaze Katara was shooting at him. “Enough. Sit down.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He sulks when picking up the chair and announces an apology to the barkeeper shooting daggers at him. When the former Fire Lord settles again, Katara slips her hand in his, lacing them together and Agni, he’s so grateful to have her here.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That doesn’t explain why you had intentionally brought Katara here.” Zuko pointed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Was there another motive behind this, Piandao? Jee?” Katara’s gaze flickered between the two men she had always trusted. She wanted answers too.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Piandao smiled admiringly at the Master waterbender, “We knew you could bring him to his senses. Prince Zuko was desperate to join the White Lotus despite his health, and I worried what would come of him once he was rejected. Coming here a year ago, we started receiving intel and evidence of all kinds at our doorstep. It didn’t take long to figure out it was you, Prince Zuko.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko shook his head. “I’m not a prince, not anymore.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Is that so.” Piandao sighed, pausing as the tea he ordered was brought to the table. “I was not aware of how fully involved you were until an informant told us you had in fact joined the Ozai Society under the guise of ‘Li’. Jee says you and Master Katara shared a deep...respect for one another-“ Zuko and Katara simultaneously blushed. “- I feared for your life and just how deep you had gotten yourself.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko nodded, yet displayed not an ounce of remorse for his actions. “I did what I had to do. I did what I felt was right.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Prince Zuko, where is Ukano?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Dead.” He says without a beat.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hmm.” Jee looks around the bar, making sure there weren’t other members of the White Lotus with prying eyes. Luckily, they were the only patrons this early in the morning and the innkeeper was informed to allow no one else entry. “You realize vigilante justice is not the same as holding a person on trial. The World leaders will not approve of this.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What do I have to lose?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Zuko snaps his head at the sound of a chair creaking and an angry Katara stomping up the stairs of the inn. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“A lot, by the looks of it.” Jee remarked, bringing the cup of tea to his lips. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Hesitancy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The gaang is all together now but sadly Iroh has not made it yet. Zuko uses this opportunity to make up for lost times but things do not go as planned when Sokka makes a taboo suggestion and the others agree, including Aang. </p><p>Katara's upset about Zuko claiming he had nothing to lose, but for how long when he always manages to tug at her heartstrings?</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you all for the lovely comments while I've been busy! Sorry for the slow update but just to reassure everyone, this will get completed, with only two more chapters to go. It makes me happy to know that you all have loyally been following this story. I will not disappoint you. It's taken some time but here is chapter 5!</p><p>I'll warn you, the feels only get deeper in this chapter, so prepare your hearts.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>" I tend to lose my sense of time and come the morning. Stayed aside. I know it's much too soon to tell you that I need you by my side. But who are we to call each other selfish lovers? We all need someone." - <strong>Hold by Dabin and Daniela Andrade.</strong></em>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Zuko stares incredulously at the burnt fish thrown in front of him on a silver plate. His brow bunches, looking at an angry Katara wiping her hands clean on the front of her robe and taking off to retrieve her meal which was perfectly cooked and neatly arranged for a nice dinner.</p><p> </p><p>He looks at her, then back at his obliterated dinner, then back at her. She didn’t bother making rice for two so he was left with a fish that looked as though it were suffering severely, even in the afterlife. And Katara happens to be that mad, so Zuko doesn’t doubt she’s capable of making that happen.</p><p> </p><p>“Is there, uh, tea?” </p><p> </p><p>‘Yes, there’s tea bags in the kitchen cabinet and a nice kettle, feel free to make as much as you’d like.” </p><p> </p><p>“Oh.” He’s in the doghouse. He’s definitely in the doghouse. “Would you like some?”</p><p> </p><p>“Nope. I’m good.” Katara lifts the cup of tea she personally made for herself to her lips and takes a long sip. She had been short since the raid ended. Piandao had offered his residence to the couple to rest on their two week journey to Caldera. Just in case, Zuko had sent out letters via messenger hawk to all the gaang telling them of his and Katara’s whereabouts. </p><p> </p><p>Katara argued that it was best to wait in person to tell them but time was not on his side. He went straight to the point and thought it a best to explain once they met. It would hasten things, though Zuko felt awful for telling his friends he was dying through a letter. </p><p> </p><p>The worst part was sending one to his uncle. He was not straight to the point with this one. No. Zuko apologized in every way he could think of in the letter before diving deeper into the tragedy that befell him and if he was to pass from this world before he made it home, he wanted his uncle to know how deeply sorry he was and that he loved him more than someone who supported him, he loved him as a father.</p><p> </p><p>Katara told him it was very genuine but afterwards left to pack and he could hear her burst out in a fit of sobs from the other room. She only spoke when necessary but deep down this was killing her and Zuko began to falter at the idea of being together. Despite this, his qualms did not outweigh his selfishness. Many things have changed about him, but not his possessiveness, not when he finally had Katara by his side. </p><p> </p><p>“You’re mad.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not mad.”</p><p> </p><p>“You <em> are </em> mad.”</p><p> </p><p>“Why would I be mad? It’s not like I have anything to lose.”</p><p> </p><p>And that strikes him through the heart like an arrow. He pokes and prods at his dinner, charred and unappetizing. It didn’t matter because Katara made it, even though it was cooked to a crisp on purpose, she took her time to provide him a meal. So reluctantly, Zuko picks through as much of the fish as he could, downing a cup of water to get through what tasted like gummy tar. He pinches his nose to deflect the smell but that doesn’t stop it from gagging his refluxes. </p><p> </p><p>Katara examines him from across the table, humming in feign satisfaction as she ate. “Don’t forget the eyes.” Katara mentions, “They're good for your health.”</p><p> </p><p><em> I </em> fear <em> for my health </em>, Zuko thought, staring at the blackened pebbles that used to be eyes. But he eats that too and the rest until there’s nothing but bone, head and tail left. All he has to do at this point is keep it down. </p><p> </p><p><em> He ate it. He actually ate it. </em>She thinks behind her disbelief. </p><p> </p><p>Katara stays quiet through the rest of dinner, coming around the table to take Zuko’s plate to clean. He offers to help and she doesn’t reply. This is a sign that she wants to be left alone.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>The bitter loneliness blanketed his heart. Katara lied next to him in bed, softly sleeping and yet he still felt alone. He tried to apologize, wanting to assure her that he was not referring to her when he said he had nothing to lose. In fact, he didn’t mean it because he had <em> everything </em> to lose. For him, it’s...easier to distance himself. Distance was the place to retreat when he didn’t have the guts to face reality. </p><p> </p><p>Katara deserved better, much better. That’s why this uncertainty swelling like a ball in his chest ached.</p><p> </p><p>She did not accept his apology nor did she discuss it further. Albeit, she stays by his side, providing him with whatever she thought he needed even when he doesn’t ask for it. She remains close, walking with him in silence and sleeping next to him.</p><p> </p><p>She felt so good, so close yet far away. Katara was more than dear to him; she was his light. She possesses more fire in her spirit than the most powerful of firebenders. A depiction of everything he wishes he could be, if only a fraction. </p><p> </p><p>Zuko really needs to reevaluate, determine just what it is he should do from now on. There’s so little time, so little time to figure it all out. His life’s mission is over. Ukano is dead and the only reason Zuko wasn’t turned in and jailed is because of Piandao’s and Jee’s sympathy. </p><p> </p><p>They’ll find the former governor in his secret bunker, the very one Zuko tipped off to the lotus. They’ll see the ghastly wounds from his dao swords, pierced through Ukano’s chest and stomach and Piandao will come up with a lie to protect the former Fire Lord. </p><p> </p><p>Zuko thinks of Mai in that moment; wonders if she is aware of her father’s misdeeds, and if not, how it will affect her. He gave Ukano a chance to turn himself in, to get another chance at reuniting with his family once again, but the man’s pride outweighed the desire to do right by his wife and children.</p><p> </p><p>That’s why Zuko killed him. Ukano was beyond saving.</p><p> </p><p>Seeing the light leave his eyes was a reminder that soon the light will fade from Zuko as well. That’s why he broke down in front of Katara. He’s rejected all the fear and desperation buried inside him for so long, it was bound to resurface. Pretending that death didn’t consume every aspect of his thoughts were easier than accepting that it ate at him every single second of every single day.</p><p> </p><p>Then she showed up in the dark; his light.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko’s gaze lingered down at Katara, who had now scooted closer to his side; one leg thrown over his and her hand rested on his chest at the very center where his scar lied. He smiles when she unknowingly caresses it, muttering his name. He can see her eyelids flutter while closed and her features twist. He kisses her cheek, Katara exhaling a soft sigh and her face relaxes into a serene state, a small smile appearing on her lips. </p><p> </p><p>“I cant promise you the world.” He whispers against her cheek. “But I can give you mine, all of mine, and I hope that- I only hope, that that is enough.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Day broke. Katara wipes the sleep from her eyes and turns on her side and bolts upright when she realizes the space on the bed next to her is empty. “Zuko?” He’s not there. Since knowing Zuko’s condition, Katara could only jump to the worst of conclusions. “Zuko?” She calls again. </p><p> </p><p>No answer. </p><p> </p><p>She throws the blanket from her lap. Hopping out of the bed barefoot she grabs a robe that had been thrown over the nightstand and jogs out the bedroom door. Katara forgets she’s stayed in Piandao’s estate the last two days. It may have been less if not for Zuko getting exhausted on their way here on the airship; unable to concentrate while maneuvering the machine. She has no clue where she is going but she has to get to Zuko as soon as possible, just to know he’s fine. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I swear to La if anything happens to him, I’m going to kill him! </em>
</p><p> </p><p>She makes a strangled sound between a sob and a laugh, rushing through the halls to the kitchen, the living area, the study, the meatery, the weapons room. She swallows down the ball lodged in her throat, becoming frantic by the minute. Her surroundings whirling into a blur. </p><p> </p><p>She’ll forget being mad, she made a deal with the universe, just give her a sign. </p><p> </p><p>Her feet come to a screeching halt when she spots a torn parchment on the ground wondering to the estate’s garden that expands to a view of the stretched out river behind it. There’s something written in it, Katara approaching to investigate, otherwise she might have overlooked it. </p><p> </p><p><em> Before I leave this world </em>... It says.</p><p> </p><p>That’s it. Katara flips the parchment over and there’s nothing. She looks around and about ten feet away from where she finds the first one, there’s another. Katara quickly picks it up.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I wish to spar swords with Sokka </em>
</p><p> </p><p>A smile broke on her face. Sokka certainly wasn’t the most skilled of swordsmen- okay, he wasn’t skilled- but he would appreciate the challenge. With a little more bounce in her step, she finds another lying in the grass and picks it up as well. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I wish to give Toph the life-changing field trip she’s always wanted </em>
</p><p> </p><p>She chokes a laugh. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I wish to learn Kyoshi techniques from Suki </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Katara is reminded how Zuko raved about the Kyoshi warriors after they were assigned to guard him upon taking the throne. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I want Uncle to know that he didn’t fail me. That he isn’t just a relative but everything I’ve wanted in a father. I only hope that I have made him proud </em>
</p><p> </p><p>This one made her tear up. Every note brought out every piece of Zuko. A part of her is selfishly happy that she’s the first to know these many things about him. Her heart flutters with excitement, collecting the notes in her arms.</p><p> </p><p>Katara slows when the next one she picks up she spots Aang’s name on it. There’s this momentary dread. Aang and her falling out isn’t because of mutual understanding. Katara soon learned the difference between what she held for Aang and what love actually meant to her and before she knew it, years went by. Moving to Republic City in hopes that they could mend only proved how different they were. </p><p> </p><p>She sighs, closing and opening her eyes, and reads on. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I wish for Aang to forgive me for what I will reveal next </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Oh. Katara twisted her fingers at the side of her robe. Her cheeks flush and her heart hammers in her chest as she treks closer to what she now realizes is the final note. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I wish to take Katara to that field of chrysanthemums, where the sun will set beyond the edge of the world and the moon is visible in the sky before night falls, so that in that perfect moment when I look in her eyes, I can finally tell her ‘I love you’ </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The notes fell from her arms, the only one she holds in the palm of her hands is the one about her. </p><p> </p><p>“This-” She begins. </p><p> </p><p>Zuko’s standing where the cliff overlooks the river, leaning against a boulder for support. “I love you.” He confesses, a bouquet of fire lilies in his right hand. He sounds weak and is flustered but the broad smile on his face made him look more alive than he had in years. </p><p> </p><p>He takes a step and Katara sobs, running into his arms. It wasn’t the sunset, the moon wasn’t in the sky and they weren’t surrounded by a field of chrysanthemums. It doesn’t matter, because this very moment when Katara says ‘I love you too’ is better than any fantasy Zuko could conjure. </p><p> </p><p>“I love you.” He says aloud again, his voice in a low husk and the warmth between them flares.</p><p> </p><p>Her heart jump starts in her chest. A callous hand cusped the back of her head and Katara mewled softly, allowing Zuko to pull her halfway. All train of thought swept away.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Katara can’t stop kissing him; his lips, his cheeks, his neck, his forehead. A laugh bubbles in her chest as Zuko’s gasps and moans at her intense affection. She can tell he likes it, his hands gripping at her sides while she straddles his lap on the bed. Zuko thinks he should bring her fire lilies and tell her he loves her everyday from now on. </p><p> </p><p>“Katara.” He tries to pause to no avail, having been in bed from morning until noon making out. “We should- mmm- probably have lunch.”</p><p> </p><p>“In a minute.” She chuckles, grinning wolfishly when she bites his bottom lip and tugs gently. </p><p> </p><p>“Oh, okay. In a minute then.” He concedes. Agni, he goes weak for her, bunching his fingers into the back of her robe. Zuko leans up, meeting Kaara in a hard kiss and rolls his tongue into her mouth and he loves the ways she mewls. </p><p> </p><p>Suddenly Zuko spasms and his body is thrown back onto the bed. His eyes roll to the back of his head. </p><p> </p><p>“Zuko!” She cries, reacting quickly and calling water from a nearby pitcher to her hand. She rips open his tunic, bending the water to his chest and manages to calm the seizure. He’s had at least two since coming here, so it came as no surprise this time. “Oh, Spirits, are you okay?”</p><p> </p><p>It takes a bit before he’s coherent, his fluttering eyes finally opening to see a worried Katara. He hated seeing her like this, and so decides to ease the tension of him losing himself right when they were in the middle of kissing. “Sorry, I got a little too excited.”</p><p> </p><p>His weak laugh is interrupted with an ‘oof’ as a pillow collides with his face. </p><p> </p><p>She’s mad, the waterbender climbing off his lap and back turned. It wasn’t the least bit funny. Though, she will admit she liked hearing his laugh again but she was shaken, still distraught that in that moment he could have been lost to her forever. </p><p> </p><p>“Katara.” He whispers, the stir of regret mixing in with his sincerity and she hates herself for forgiving him so easily. Spirits, she just wanted to kiss him. </p><p> </p><p>“What?” She snaps, keeping up with her false anger, huffing.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry. I tried to make light of a situation and- that was uncalled for. I didn’t mean to upset you.” </p><p> </p><p>Katara’s shoulders stiffen and her breath stills at the warmth on her back. Large hands slide around her torso, settling gently on her stomach. His mouth settles nicely at the pulse of her neck and the waterbender closes her eyes as he breathes her in. Gooseflesh rose where his lips rested, leaving an imprint that would forever stay in Katara’s mind. </p><p> </p><p>Damn it all to hell, she can’t stay mad at him. <em> At least give me that </em>, Katara thought, but there was no winning. </p><p> </p><p>“Never again.” She frowns, finally giving him her attention. The tears stung her eyes, a stray one trickling down her cheek and Zuko sweetly sweeps it away with the pad of his thumb. </p><p> </p><p>“Never again.” He promises. </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Zuko can’t believe it. They’re all the same people he knew but they weren’t. Aang, Sokka, Toph, Suki...all of them were here before him, staring at him as though he was some sort of creature crawling out from the sea. He grips the hand of his lover and the cane she had crafted for him. Zuko’s choked, unsure of what to say now that everyone he loves is finally in front of him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko notes that Sokka closes his eyes in disbelief. They can see it all; his pale skin, his thin figure, his sunken cheeks, all of him. Zuko wants to cry because this was not how he wanted to reunite with his friends. Even with that in mind he can’t get over how intensely Aang is staring at him and his hand linked with Katara’s. How can he ever explain this to him. </p><p> </p><p>“How long?” Aang asks, finally looking Zuko in the eye.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko swallows. “Um- I…” Where should he begin? Just because he’s dying doesn’t mean that Aang will forgive him for being with Katara.</p><p> </p><p>Aang walks up to him and stops only several feet. Their heights are the same, a reminder that the Avatar isn’t the scrawny little twelve year old he once hunted. </p><p> </p><p>“Aang...I can’t begin to explain- Huh?” Aang pulls Zuko into a harsh hug. The Avatar’s body is shaking uncontrollably and Zuko’s hesitant on what to do next.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t- Don’t. You. <em> Ever </em> ...make us worry like that <em> again </em>.” Aang is crying, clinging to his best friend. Zuko buries his face in Aang’s shoulder as the rest of the gaang joins them one by one. He was not expecting this, to be enveloped in the love and support of his once newfound family. He should have done this sooner, he should have given himself and them that at least.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>“You’ve known since the beginning.” Aang concludes, shadows darkening his features. Zuko had explained everything in Piandao’s living area. Aang sat crossed legged on the floor, Sokka and Suki held hands tightly next to each other on the lounge chair and Toph was leaning with her back against the wall. “How could I have not caught on? I should have guessed what you were going through- damn it, it didn’t feel right!”</p><p> </p><p>Everyone’s brow shot up, having heard for the first time Aang swear. </p><p> </p><p>“It would not have changed anything.” Zuko sighs. “I was stubborn. Getting away was the only solution I could come up with. And besides, Uncle and Koji were my drive behind me leaving in the first place.”</p><p> </p><p>“But maybe I could have convinced you otherwise. Maybe we could have come up with a solution together.”</p><p> </p><p>“Maybe.” Zuko dismisses. They can’t focus on the what-ifs of the past. They were all here now with the exception of Iroh, a family again. In fact, Zuko is becoming more frantic on how soon his uncle will make it here, having sent Iroh his letter first. </p><p> </p><p>“Look, maybe there’s a cure or something. There has to be a solution?” Sokka suggests.</p><p> </p><p>“I told you, Yugoda says there’s nothing more she can do.”</p><p> </p><p>“That <em> she </em> can do. She’s not the only famous healer, Katara what about you?”</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t you think I’ve tried, Sokka?” She snaps at her brother. “Sorry. It’s just been sinking in much longer for me. It’s been hard for me.”</p><p> </p><p>“Because you love him.” Suki chimed in.</p><p> </p><p>Katara stiffens as though she’s on the spot and unintentionally glances at Aang who’s hanging his head but nods. “Yes. Because I love him. Besides, I’m not as skilled as Yugoda and if she doesn’t have the power or techniques to save him, what makes you think I can?”</p><p> </p><p>“Well,” Sokka looks around at his friends, “because you can bloodbend.” Everyone jumps out of their seats in horror save Toph. </p><p> </p><p>“Are you mad?!” Aang shouts.</p><p> </p><p>“Sokka, think before you blurt out something insensitive.” Suki reprimands. </p><p> </p><p>“Why not? Katara’s the best waterbending master in the world and if anyone’s capable of saving Zuko, it’s her. Look, I’m not a fan either but bloodbending has proven to be a powerful bending form and who’s to say it doesn’t have healing benefits?”</p><p> </p><p>“Katara never stuck around to find out and it’s probably for the best.” Aang argued.</p><p> </p><p>“Snoozles is right.” Toph retorted, finally speaking up since listening to Zuko’s story. “It could save Zuko’s life. Just because Hama used it for evil purposes doesn’t mean the form itself should be used for evil purposes.”</p><p> </p><p><em> Wow </em>, Katara thought when Toph spoke, no nickname. That’s when you knew the earthbender was serious.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you!”</p><p> </p><p>“There’s one problem.” Katara sighs. “I don’t think I can do it. The only two times I have, was purely out of anger. I don’t know if I have the ability to heal with bloodbending as the source.”</p><p> </p><p>“Well, Sokka may be onto something.” Suki settles back in her seat. “You have great concentration, Katara. You can tap into things no one else can, it’s worth a shot at saving Zuko, you have to believe that. If it were Sokka, I know I’d do everything I can even if it happens to be taboo.” The Kyoshi warrior encloses a hand over her husband’s. </p><p> </p><p>“I-” Aang starts, scratching the back of his head. “I mean, if it were to save him, I don’t know how I could ever argue with that.”</p><p> </p><p>“See, sugarqueen. Everyone else agrees.”</p><p> </p><p>Katara ponders over this. She could try, it's the least she can do. “There’s a full moon two weeks from now but, I’m afraid there’s the off chance of this hindering Zuko’s health, so it might call for several sessions. But if Zuko trusts me- ”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko taps his cane hard on the floor. “No.”</p><p> </p><p>“No?” Katara questions. “You don’t trust me?”</p><p> </p><p>“No. It’s not that I don’t trust you. I don’t want to spend my remaining days alive like that. I want you by my side but not as my healer. I will not pass on with the memory of you taking care of me like a sick patient and I certainly don’t want you blaming yourself if anything were to go wrong.”</p><p> </p><p>“But this could be your chance. Listen to Katara. Even I agree with this.” Aang tries to reason with him.</p><p> </p><p>“I appreciate it, I do. Having you all here means the world to me but I called you here for your company, not a solution. There is no solution and if bloodbending happens to be that, I refuse to put Katara through it.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>They dropped the conversation for Zuko. Instead they all enjoyed a quiet meal Zuko himself had made for them out in the garden. Katara is anxious the whole time because she’s been kicked out of the kitchen and told to relax with the others. Everyone compliments the meal and Zuko is proud to admit that his time living alone forced him to work on his cooking skills. </p><p> </p><p>During a quiet night of conversation and warm saki, the gaang updates Zuko on how they are currently doing. Sokka and Suki of course got married and have two beautiful twin girls, now being watched by Gran Gran during their time here. Aang raves on about Republic City and describes how it was everything he and Zuko had envisioned and Zuko wishes he could have been there to see it. And Toph proudly announces her metalbending school.</p><p> </p><p>There’s so much to catch up on and so little time. Zuko’s overwhelmed by how much he’s missed out, excusing himself and leaving to wash the dishes. Katara follows him to the kitchen.</p><p> </p><p>“Talk to me, Zuko.” </p><p> </p><p>“We have been talking. We’ve talked all night.”</p><p> </p><p>“Not about the others, about me healing you.”</p><p> </p><p>“Kat, I told you. I’m done discussing it.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not. You’re not giving this a chance, I really believe this is it. If it were the other way around, wouldn’t you do the same for me?”</p><p> </p><p>His face falls into his hands, trying hard not to get worked up. This is Katara; his love, his life and she’s only being thoughtful. Zuko had to find a way to convey to her how this is making him feel. “Katara, you mean well, I get it. I understand where you’re coming from but this is what I want. I’m a dying man with no future. This,” he gently takes her hand, “is worth more to me than spending a possibility of a million days bedridden. I want to die seeing your loving eyes, not sadness on your face. I want to go in peace. I’m not asking you to accept it, I’m asking you to honor it.”</p><p> </p><p>She couldn’t fight that. It pains her but she couldn’t deflect his wishes. The stubborn side of her wants to persuade him but the empathetic side of her gets where he’s coming from.</p><p> </p><p>“I want to marry you, Katara.”</p><p> </p><p>Blue eyes widen. “Zuko…”</p><p> </p><p>“Marry me.” He whispers, leaning his forehead to hers, reflecting the smile stretching on her quivering lips. A warm finger touches her lips and Katara closes her eyes. “Marry me tomorrow.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes!”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko pulls her into his embrace, laughing joyously, dropping his cane so that he could lift her by the waist and swing her around. Katara yelps, wrapping her arms around his neck, the world around them moves in slow motion. The light in Zuko’s eyes fade to dark and a confused Katara collapses on top of him as he falls. </p><p> </p><p>“Zuko?” This isn’t a seizure, he knows it isn't. “Zuko!”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> It’s too late. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“Sokka! Aang! Somebody!”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I’m sorry. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “No. No. No. No…” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Her voice fades and Zuko’s heart beats weak to a stop.</p>
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